I’ve known Kim Dorwart and her family for most of my life.  I was good friends with her older sister, beginning in fifth grade, and I remember Kim running around the house in her footie pajamas.  Years later, my brother began dating another of Kim’s sisters, and she eventually became my sister-in-law.  This family is also my family.

Last Thursday, Kim’s daughter, Vanessa, was tragically killed.  (See more of the story here:  philly.com)  No parent should ever have to deal with the loss of a child.  This incident has rocked me to the core.  Not only did I know and love this family, my daughter is almost the same age as Vanessa, and that adds another element of fear.

But this isn’t about me; it’s about the family getting through this horrible time.  There are several ways that you can help, and I hope that you will.

• You can visit the R.I.P. Gina Gentile and Vanessa Dorwart Facebook page and offer words of encouragement to the family and friends.
• If you are in the Philadelphia area, you can attend a benefit for the family.  More information can be found here:  Benefit for the Gentile and Dowart Families.
• Donations to help cover funeral costs can be sent to:  The Vanessa M. Dorwart Memorial Fund, c/o Beneficial Bank, 1862 Delmar Drive, Folcroft, PA 19032.
• Wired 96.5 is collecting donations and will be holding a benefit as well.

Hug your children close.

Vanessa’s obituary.

The newest member of our family is BlackJack. He is an 11-month-old Chihuahua/Rat Terrier mix. What a sweet boy! Unfortunately, he has some socialization issues, but we are working on them. We got him from a family that just had too much activity for the little guy to handle.

He’s been with us for two weeks today. I can’t imagine my life without him now!

What a difference one week can make! So much in my life has changed in the last seven days.

Here’s the recap:

Monday- Signed the last of the divorce papers. It should be final in 4-6 weeks! Hallelujah!!

Tuesday- About 1 p.m., I received a call asking if I could go for a 4 p.m. interview that day. I went AND I was offered the job!

Wednesday- Received my financial aid approval in the mail. I can afford to go to school in September!

Thursday- My first (short) day at my new job!

It’s been an exhausting but excellent week for me. I’m so grateful that things are finally falling into place! I have to thank my family–especially Tim–for all the love, support and encouragement that has gotten me to this point. I wouldn’t have all of this good news to share if it weren’t for them!  I love you!

The following post was originally written on December 16, 2007. I am fortunate enough to be surrounded by some the most caring, generous and loving people on the planet, so felt this post was worth repeating!

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Another Form of Family

We’ve all seen the phrase, “Friends are family we choose for ourselves.” And how true that is for me! Especially over the last four years or so, my friends have been more like family than the one I was born into.When I first separated from my husband, it was my friends who were there to offer encouragement and support when my ‘real family’ all but turned their backs on me.To this day, my friends still feel more like family than my blood relatives do.

In the past year and a half, I’ve been blessed with the addition of a whole new branch to my self-made family tree. My boyfriend’s family and extended family have become a very important part of my life. In a very short time, I felt welcomed, accepted and cared about, and I certainly felt the same about them!

There are times I mourn not having the relationship I’d like with my parents, brother and sister. It should be different, but it’s not, and I don’t believe there’s anything I can do to significantly change that. What I focus on is the wonderful people who surround me now. And I try to remind myself–often–of how very lucky I am to have my chosen family!

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Scrolling Saturday was created by the most wonderful Melissa at Such Simple Pleasures and the very talented Coleen at Manners and Moxie.

Happy Saturday!

Don’t forget to stop by and check out my new blog: The Salty Mooch! It’s not quite a week old yet, and could use some bloggy love!

Warning: This post is not for the faint of heart! Proceed at your own risk! LOL!

The other day, I saw a news article, “Pregnant woman uses train toilet, baby slips out.” In Ahmedabad, India, a pregnant woman gave birth while sitting on the crapper on a train.

According to the article, most of the toilets on Indian trains are merely shoots that empty right onto the tracks. (How disgusting is that?!) So, yes, you guessed it, the baby girl was found lying on the train tracks!

If you’ve been reading my blog for any length of time, you know I like to write about these crazy kinds of stories, but this one is even better!

You see, my daughter, B, almost had the same fate!

No, she wasn’t born on a train. She didn’t end up on train tracks. And she wasn’t born in India.

B was, however, thisclose to being born in a toilet!

It was March of 1995. I was at the hospital and in labor with baby #4. I remember saying to myself, “Oh shit, I remember what this feels like now!” as the contractions got stronger.

My doctor had stopped in and checked on me at some point, and told me I had a ways to go. He was going to drop his wife off at the airport and come back. Neither of us knew then that he wouldn’t be back in time.

One of the nurses measured and said I was only x centimeters dilated. (Another one who believed I had a ways to go.)

I was in pain, tired and pissed that I had a ways to go–and did I mention the pain?–so I told them I wanted drugs.

Nurse informed me that I’d have to have an iv, so I wouldn’t be able to get out of bed again. As I’m not very fond of bed pans, I opted to use the restroom one last time before they hooked me up with my liquid relief.

*** This is the part you may want to skip if you’re at all apprehensive of hearing about using the toilet or the nitty-gritty details of babies almost being born. ***

Within seconds of me sitting on the commode, Nurse walked by the open restroom door, and asked, “You don’t feel like you have to push, do you?”, when I felt the baby’s head! So, a very surprised me responded, “Uh, yes!”

I don’t know where they all came from, but there were suddenly about six people in the room, getting me back onto the bed, my feet in the stirrups and telling me not to push. Heh!

One of the associates from my doctor’s office came rushing down to someone’s rescue (cuz I certainly wasn’t going to hold that kid in much longer–hello?!), and delivered my beautiful baby girl. The doctor’s shirt got ruined because (bless him!) he didn’t even take the time to throw scrubs on.

Being just shy of 13, B doesn’t quite see the humor in this story yet. She will.